Romance is a genre about how people treat one another. It seems right that our events should be too. This page explains what we expect from everyone in the room, what we will not accept, and exactly what happens if something goes wrong.
A signing weekend is a lot of people leaning on each other at once. An author's nerves, a reader's courage in walking up to a table, a vendor's long drive, a volunteer's early morning. All of it is touching all the rest of it, constantly.
That is why harassment is never a private matter between two people. It changes the air in the whole room. One person made small can flatten someone else's whole weekend, three tables away, without them ever knowing why.
So the standard is simple. Do not cause harm here. Everything below is us being specific about what that means, and what we will do when it happens anyway.
Four questions, and they take about a second. Is it true? Is it kind? Does it need saying? Is this the right moment? If something cannot get past those, it is usually better left unsaid.
We are not asking anyone to be careful to the point of stiffness. This is a romance event. It is loud and funny and frank about desire, and we would not want it any other way. We are asking that the frankness travel alongside kindness rather than straight over the top of somebody.
Every person here arrived wanting to be treated well. The debut author at the quiet table wants it as much as the bestseller with the longest line in the room. Extend warmth first, and extend it widest to the people who get it least often.
Being nice can mean smoothing something over so nobody feels awkward. Being kind sometimes means removing the person who is causing harm, even when that makes the afternoon uncomfortable. We will choose kind. We will not leave someone to quietly endure a bad situation so that nobody has to have a difficult conversation.
Another author's long line is not a verdict on your worth. Enjoy it for them if you can. Publishing is hard enough without carrying envy through a weekend that is meant to be a celebration.
Our attention does not scale with anyone's follower count. A complaint from a first-time attendee is weighed exactly the same as a complaint from a headliner.
Good intentions need edges, or they cannot protect anybody. Harassment at our events includes, and is not limited to:
Two clarifications, because they always come up. Talking about explicit content is not harassment. This is an adult event full of adult books, and frank conversation about them is expected. Aiming that content at someone who did not sign up for the conversation is harassment. And turning down an interaction is never harassment. Anyone can say no, walk away, or end a conversation at any point, and no explanation is owed to anybody.
Our shelves are full of books about enthusiastic consent. We would like the ballroom to match the page. Ask before touching, ask before photographing, ask before hugging, even someone whose books you have loved for a decade. Silence is not agreement. A hesitant yes is not a yes. If you are unsure, asking costs you nothing.
You do not need to be certain and you do not need proof. If something felt wrong, that is enough to tell us.
We will listen without asking you to justify feeling uncomfortable. We will ask what you need rather than deciding for you. We will not make you face the other person, and we will not give them your name without your agreement unless we are legally required to.
Getting something wrong does not make a person beyond saving. It also does not make it the harmed person's job to sit through someone else's education. We hold both of those at once.
Depending on what happened, our response may include a private conversation, a formal warning, moving tables or spaces apart, removal from an event or from the venue, a ban from future events, or contacting hotel security or law enforcement. Removal carries no refund of any ticket, table, or fee.
We would rather somebody learn than be shut out. But the safety of the person who was harmed comes first, and where those two things pull against each other, safety wins every time. Decisions rest with the organizing team, whose judgment on the day is final.
Reporting something in good faith will never cost you your table, your ticket, or your standing with us. Retaliating against someone who reports is itself a serious violation.
Everywhere the event is: the ballroom, the Romance Academy, the mixer, hotel common areas, our social media, and our group chats. Behavior outside the event that creates a credible safety risk inside it is our concern too.
Most people who cause harm at events did not arrive planning to. They arrived certain they already knew how everyone here works.
Try arriving a little unsure instead. Ask people what they write, what they want to be called, whether they would like a hug. Let yourself be corrected without treating it as an attack. That willingness does more to keep a weekend safe than any list of banned behaviors ever will.
Not perfection. Nobody shows up flawless, us included. We will get things wrong, and when we do we would like to be told so we can put it right.
What we are asking for is attention. Notice the person in front of you. Notice when a conversation has stopped being mutual. Notice when you are the loudest thing in somebody's afternoon. That noticing is most of the work, and it is very nearly the whole of this policy.
Anything here that is unclear, or any accommodation you need in order to feel safe with us, can go to hotandsteamybookevents@gmail.com. We would far rather hear from you early than find out afterward.